wimper

the pains continue

to rip and fold and slide all

over my body

*     *     *     *     *

A surreal one happened last night.

The first sensation was like the rounded end of a metal pen sliding across the bottom of my ribs.  I looked down into the water of the hot tub to see if a branch or something had fallen in the water.  Nothing was there but my side.

Then, the whole segment which had felt as if it had been touched felt more like a copper wire was against the entire segment, about 7-8 inches along the bottom of my right rib cage.

Then, in felt like it was digging into my skin, similar to a cramp one gets while running.  Although, I don't know that what I felt as a cramp was the same as others, so maybe stick with the feeling of the wire digging into me, as if I was cheese being cut.

Then, a folding sensation, and it was done.

I'm getting really tired of this.

*     *     *     *     *

And Fall is here.  We had rain today.  It'll be too cold for me to swim for at least a few days.

The dread of another winter has yet to set upon me.  We still have a few warm weeks, more likely than not, before mother nature starts fucking with me.

I feel foolish, hoping I can find my center before then and get all the parts in their right place.  The odds can't be good.

*     *     *     *     *

Last, I had a near miss on the road today.  The one day this month I get in the car and I have a close call.  Go figure.

The light for my left turn switched to green and I started going.  My car was almost all the way into the intersection when I noticed something in the corner of my eye and hit the brakes, when an SUV of some type runs the red and blazes in front of my car by about 8 feet.

Not that close, but it unnerved me.

The next intersection, less than 100 yards away, was clogged with traffic, and I caught up with the SUV there.

I pulled along side it to find out who this asshole was, only to see an attractive mid 20s woman, her face and attention buried into her smartphone.  "Are you fucking kidding me?" I said.

I've been rattled still all day long.  It is amazing how easy it is to die on our roads with these kind of idiots using them too.

I have been through way too much shit, too much pain, and too much physical rehabilitation to end up road kill because of some stupid piece of shit staring at a phone instead of the road.

I know it happens daily, but this was the first time I saw someone do it.

And had I been just a few seconds later, approaching that intersection when the light changed instead of having been at a stop  (which happens pretty often, even for me, a guy that doesn't drive much), I have no doubt that SUV would have demolished my car.

*     *     *     *     *

I hate stupidity.